Having watched the United States pull off the same “democracy export” routine in country after country over the decades—Iraq, Libya, Syria, you name it—we all knew exactly how this Venezuela saga would unfold. And here we are in historic January 2026: the script delivered on cue.
Step one: Elevate the West’s favored opposition figure to hero status. María Corina Machado, fresh off her 2025 Nobel Peace Prize for championing “democratic rights,” (awarded precisely for opposing the Bolivarian government) gets positioned as the ideal transitional leader. This sets the stage perfectly for President Trump to bask in the glow of “liberating” Venezuela, paving his own path to a Nobel—because nothing says peace like airstrikes and regime decapitation.
The prize? Venezuela’s massive oil and gas reserves flowing to Europe and the US at bargain-basement prices—practically free. Europe rejoices, finally ditching Russian supplies in a deal far sweeter than Norway’s old Telenor telecom partnership with Bangladesh’s Grameenphone, which funneled profits north while building mobile networks in the south. Norway cashes in big, American drivers pay less at the pump, and even Ukraine might snag some cheap energy amid its woes.
Any critical coverage or dissenting opinions? Swiftly muted through media spin, sanctions threats, and the usual tools of influence. Suddenly, Venezuela transforms in headlines into a gleaming “paradise,” a “promised land” handpicked and blessed by Washington—complete with propaganda blitz and military backup.
With those endless oil riches, the new setup could even stand on its own feet even after massive plundering, trading with 3rd world countries and mimicking self-made successes like Japan or South Korea—no more groveling for handouts from the land lords.
And let’s not overlook the elegant financial loop: The incoming leaders will quietly amass assets in Miami condos, European banks, and US markets. Every dollar of “aid” or investment from the West boomerangs right back home. Eco-friendly economics in action—recycling wealth while the world frets over climate and endless money printing.
Still best wishes to this freshly minted Western outpost, formerly known as Venezuela to us. And a tongue-in-cheek toast to the incoming team and their international backers, set to reap the rewards from the latest chapter in the empire’s playbook.